Throughout the novel, TJ represses his emotions, a habit since childhood that he refers to as “stuffing.” This term becomes a motif throughout the novel, as TJ stuffs everything from emotions to the truth. At the beginning of the novel, Paul assumes that TJ and John suddenly leave his birthday party because TJ is in trouble. As a result, he snubs TJ, who responds in the same way he has since childhood: “I told myself he hadn’t heard me. That’s quality stuffing, right there” (22). Even when he is angry with John, his first instinct is to repress his emotions: “My anger at him resurfaced when I saw his thumbnail photo on my phone, but I tried to stuff my resentment while the call connected” (54).

TJ knows that this habit isn’t a good thing: “I’m good at stuffing my feelings, though apparently it’s a bad thing to be good at” (11). Over the course of the story, TJ grows by putting this habit aside, letting his emotions and the truth come forward so that he can confront and deal with them. This motif also connects with his alcohol addiction—from an early age, TJ found an outlet for the feelings he couldn’t let out through drinking.