“My mother and I never really understood one another. We translated each other’s meanings and I seemed to hear less than what was said, while my mother heard more.”

Jing-Mei, with her American perspective, feels that her mother found hidden “Chinese” meaning in their interactions. This passage sets the tone for the main themes of the novel, as the stories demonstrate how both the mothers and daughters have struggled and continue to struggle to understand each other. They blame language and cultural differences, like the woman in the opening parable who didn’t want to explain to her daughter about her “good intentions” until she could tell her in perfect English.

“In me, they see their own daughters, just as ignorant, just as unmindful of all the truths and hopes they have brought to America. […] They see daughters who will bear grandchildren born without any connecting hope passed from generation to generation.”

The Aunties are appalled when Jing-Mei says that she didn’t really know her mother. They believe that the maternal bond is innate, in the blood and bones. Yet they have all feared that their daughters don’t understand them and the sacrifices they have made out of love and hope for their children’s future, so Jing-Mei’s statement highlights their fears.

“The wound begins to close in on itself, to protect what is hurting so much. And once it is closed, you no longer see what is underneath, what started the pain.”

An-Mei’s scar symbolized how she buried the pain of being separated from her mother. In doing so, she forgot about her love and the devotion her mother showed her. Later this wound symbolically opened and An-Mei again felt their bond. There are many instances in the novel using the