Courage is the titular theme in “The courage that my mother had,” as the speaker explores the discrepancy between her mother’s key virtue and her own lack, ruing that a trait like courage cannot be passed between generations like an inherited object. Millay never explicitly states why the speaker needs courage so desperately; she implies that the speaker is having trouble facing her grief at her mother’s death, and needs courage in light of this, but she leaves the poem open to interpretation. The speaker might need courage in other aspects of her life, and is haunted by the memory that her mother was able to face difficulty “like a rock” (Line 11), while she cannot.

Millay explores the idea that what is most valuable about a loved one is also fleeting and intangible, and the physical items that a person leaves behind after death are insufficient consolation to the absence of admirable characteristics like her mother’s courage. The speaker claims that there is “no thing I treasure more” (Line 7) than the golden brooch her mother left her, but immediately admits that “it is something I could spare” (Line 8)—the implication being that she would happily trade away the piece of jewelry, which does her no good, for her mother’s less concrete possessions.