Wang begins her first essay by commenting on the way people view schizophrenia and those with the disorder; it is painful for people to watch someone deteriorate mentally, and the disorder is often associated with a sense of doom. Schizophrenia is often spoken of in terms of the way it affects others rather than the person who has the disorder. Wang describes it as being in a dark room, apart from reality and external logic, and that being lost inside this reality must be faced with courage. Citing the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), Wang notes that 1.1% of Americans have schizophrenia, 3.7% have schizotypal disorder, and another 0.3% have schizoaffective disorder. Originally diagnosed with bipolar disorder, it took another 12 years to for Wang be diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder in her mid-twenties. She started experiencing auditory and visual hallucinations such as seeing demons or a train coming toward her and knew it was not normal. Wang also had trouble with concentration, brain fog, memory loss, and extreme fatigue.

Wang feels comforted by her diagnosis: “A diagnosis says that I am crazy, but in a particular way: one that has been experienced and recorded not just in modern times” (5).