“I ached for fluffy jammies and a deep, forget-the-world sleep.”

This simple image of yearning for flannel pajamas and a restful sleep that many people take for granted captures the constant heightened state of tension Callie’s experiences to survive. She doesn’t have the luxury of resting and forgetting the world, even while unconscious, and this highlights just how challenging her life is.

“It had been a long time since I’d been happy. A long time since life was just lip gloss and music and silly girlfriends. A long time since my biggest concerns were whether there would be a test or if I’d forgotten my homework. I was aiming for more like safe, free, and alive.”

Callie’s harsh reality as unhoused barely getting by on the streets has put the idea of happiness far out of her mind. She has been so consumed with survival that she hasn’t had time to worry about things she considers trivial like lip gloss and happiness. The fact that Callie sees happiness as something of the past shows how little hope she has for the future, the exact mindset that makes her vulnerable to agreeing to have a microchip implanted in her head at Prime Destinations.

“I’m guessing the process goes a lot smoother if you have a cooperative donor. But I won’t be feeling very cooperative if I can’t speak to my brother first.”

Though Callie lacks confidence in herself and doesn’t have much to bargain with, she uses what she does have to get what she wants. She learned how to be a fierce negotiator and take her time to weigh her options from her father, and the threat of not cooperating is enough to make Prime give her what she wants.