“When Eva Mercy was little, her mom had told her that Creole women see signs. This was back when Eva’s only understanding of ‘Creole’ was that it was vaguely connected to Louisiana and Black people with French last names. It wasn’t until junior high that she realized her mom was—what’s the word?—eccentric and curated ‘signs’ to justify her whims. (Mariah Carey released an album called Charmbracelet? Let’s blow rent on cubic zirconia at Zales!) Point is, Eva was wired to believe that the universe sent her messages.”

This quote introduces the uneasiness in Lizette and Eva’s relationship, and it introduces the superstitions passed down from Lizette and her ancestors. This motif of superstition shows Lizette as a character, as well as where Eva’s family is from, which becomes increasingly important as the novel continues. It also foreshadows that change is coming, creating stakes immediately.

“Sickness wasn’t sexy. And her disability was invisible—she wasn’t missing a limb or in a full-body cast. Her level of suffering seemed impossible for others to fathom. After all, everyone gets headaches sometimes, like during coffee withdrawal or the flu. So she hid it. All people knew is she canceled plans a lot. (‘Busy Writing!’). And was prone to fainting, like at Denise and Todd’s wedding (‘Too much prosecco!’). Or forgot words midsentence (‘Sorry, just distracted’). Or disappeared for weeks at a time (‘Writing Retreat!’—definitely not an in-patient stay in Mount Sinai’s pain ward).”

Eva’s disability affects her entire life and is a massive part of her character and how she moves through the world. However, the lengths she goes to hide her disability from others is also a huge part of her character—she doesn’t want anyone to know how much she suffers, especially since her disability is invisible. There is also irony in the idea of trying to hide an invisible illness.

“Eva’s parenting wasn’t mommy-blog approved. They often had pizza for dinner and fell asleep watching Succession, and since childcare was a luxury, Audre attended too many grown-up events. Plus, on bad head days, Eva allowed Audre unlimited TikTok time after homework so she could crash for a bit. But Eva let herself off the hook for those things. When it came to mothering, what mattered to her was setting a powerful example. When Audre audited her memories, Eva wanted her to remember a ballsy woman who invented her life from scratch. No man, no help, no problem. The Single-Mom Superhero myth, thought Eva, and it’s a trap.”

At the core of who she is, Eva is a mother. She is determined to be better than her mother, despite her disability. Being a good mother is her focus now, but like in her past, she wants to control the story about who she is as a mother. If she seems strong, she is strong, and her daughter won’t remember anything different. Not only does Eva go out of her way to hide her disability, but she also puts equal effort into being the best mother.