The next morning, the parlor maid tells Mrs. Higgins that Higgins and Pickering are here. Mrs. Higgins tells her to keep Eliza upstairs for the time being. Higgins and Pickering rush into the drawing room, concerned about Eliza’s disappearance. Higgins seems most concerned about her disappearance because of her responsibilities of maintaining his diary and organizing his things. This misplaced concern upsets Mrs. Higgins, who feels that he is treating her as if she were a lost umbrella.

Alfred Doolittle arrives, dressed in a fancy wedding suit and furious with Higgins. Higgins jokingly described Doolittle’s unique moral philosophy to the American Moral Reform Society and recommended him as the “most original moralist in England.” This society, as a result, left Doolittle a pension of 3,000 pounds per year. Upset, Doolittle is now obligated to join the middle class and must begrudgingly marry his common-law wife, found a Moral Reform Society, and speak to other moral societies.

Mrs. Higgins comments that this will at least solve the problem of who shall provide for Eliza. Higgins and Doolittle argue, essentially over who owns Eliza, as Higgins previously paid Doolittle five pounds for her. Mrs. Higgins reveals that Eliza is upstairs and explains her feelings of abandonment and rejection.