Conrad, the youngest of the two Jarrett sons, has always been “[a]n obedient boy. Polite. Obedient. Well mannered. Even in the hospital, […] his behavior was proper, full of respect” (13). At the beginning of the novel, he is just shy of 18 years old and is starting his junior year of high school, though he should be a senior. Conrad is experiencing an identity crisis and survivor’s guilt after the death of his older brother, Buck, and his own suicide attempt.

Conrad is an over-achiever, known for being a straight-A student while excelling on the swim team and in choir. After he returns from his long hospital stay following his suicide attempt, he is met with mixed reactions from his family, friends, and teachers. Some act as if nothing ever happened. Others, such as his English teacher, are gentler and more concerned for him. His swim coach, Salan, makes him feel inadequate for losing some of his athleticism and stigmatizes Conrad for his mental health crisis.

Music is an escape from his depression and anxiety, which have been constant since Buck’s death. Music becomes a motif for Conrad’s healing, and as he grows stronger and starts to recover from his grief, he turns more and more to his passion for music, specifically playing the guitar and composing original songs.