Identity and self-acceptance are key to character and plot development in Loveless. The central conflict in this novel is Georgia’s understanding of her identity and desires. She has internalized her family, friends, and larger society’s elevation of romantic relationships and families. By the time she graduates high school, she’s the only young person she knows who has never been kissed. Romantic comedies evoke idyllic fantasies in which teenage girls strive to be seen as sexualized beings. Georgia’s peers have kissed and most have had sex, and her parents have been in a loving marriage for decades. However, she has never had a real crush. She is repulsed by the prospect of kissing and uncertain how to adhere to societal expectations. Georgia believes in romance, but never experienced it herself.

When Georgia discovers the terms asexual and aromantic, her lack of desire suddenly makes sense to her. However, coming to terms with her aroace identity is a difficult journey. It challenges the future that her society prepared her for, as Georgia assumes she will never be happy without romance. Letting go of this message feels impossible, especially in her isolation. Sunil and Ellis are crucial to her character development because they prove she’s not alone in her identity.