Over the next few months, April becomes what she hates most: a professional pundit who cares about being good on TV. April admits to the reader that she isn’t proud of the months leading to July 13, which the reader is probably anticipating. April outlines the events of the next few months through vignettes, starting with a tweet posted that day.

In February, April tries to write her book, “My Life with Carl.” Putnam tells April she loses her credibility if Peter continues being a bestselling author while she doesn’t. Though April wonders if ghostwriting is okay, Robin tells her it is not something April May would do and offers to find her a great editor. April meets with a few editors before deciding on Sylvia Stone, who points out that her story is too big and not over. April narrows her story to her desire for people to believe the Carls are a good thing rather than a nightmare, and Sylvia makes an outline for what will become a manifesto.

In March, Robin books April for an appointment at a day spa, where she hears a woman complaining, saying how disgusting it is that April discusses international relations despite being a child.