“My on-air meltdown was the direct result of an extended run of mindlessness, a period of time during which I was focused on advancement and adventure to the detriment of pretty much everything else in my life. It began on March 13, 2000: my first day at ABC News.”

Harris establishes that his behaviors between 2000 and 2004 directly led to his panic attack. He also indicates his early addictions, which included his need for an “edge” to have success and to feel the rush of adrenaline, which added to his need for what he later describes as “journalistic heroin” (14).

“Straight from childhood, I was a frequent mental inventory taker, scanning my consciousness for objects of concern, kind of like pressing a bruise to see if it still hurts. In my view, the balance between stress and contentment was life’s biggest riddle.”

Not only does this show Harris’s proclivity to worry, but it also shows that he likes to be aware of his internal state at all times. Wanting to pause his overactive mind is what leads Harris to begin his meditation journey.

“I found a degree of comfort in the fact that my case was not an aberration […] while the psychological impacts on veterans were well-documented, an underreported study on war correspondents found high rates of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), major depression, and alcohol abuse.”

Harris's PTSD diagnosis helps him realize that his traumatic experiences overseas impacted his inner life, providing a psychological impulse to self-medicate. His reference to studies here shows that Harris finds comfort in the experience of others as well as in scientific reasoning.